I don't think I have bpd, but I have Something going on with my head with unhealthy attachments to specific people. And I want a place to just vague post my thoughts. This feels low risk.. the person they're about doesn't have neocities, and this page is not linked anywhere, its not like they'd find it through the updates page or anything. Yeah
4/10/2025

I definitely felt like you didn't want to talk to me today. Well, more than a feeling, it was pretty concrete (and I swear that on my life). I felt like this yesterday too. I know. I know I'm too antsy. I didn't really give you any space at all since I left your house. And you're allowed to feel like that. It's been 7.5 hours since I sent anything to you (or you to me, for that matter). I see you're on a call now. Cool. I'll be normal about it. If you don't say goodnight to me I don't know what I'll do. I probably won't messge you in the morning, just see how long it goes on.

I wanted to cry the other day when you just didn't care about the animals I was sending you. I had felt so dispirited, so stressed, and looking at a bunch of animals I'd never seen before really made me feel better. And I wanted to share that. But I'm too much, I know. I talk too much, send too much, I never shut the fuck up. The added lukewarm reaction from my dad when I tried to show him the animals just sent me over the edge.

4/28/2025
This isn't even about you I just hate my period so much. I feel like I've said everything wrong in the last hour and I want to cry and cry and cry. I feel like I was overly hateful and I feel like I'm the reason you dont want to talk to your friends and I feel like. I don't know! I just want to cry.